Y is a vowel, live with it

delivering in the dales

2007-04-23T19:57:00.000Z

i've given up driving down farm tracks to drop off leaflets - some of the buggers' measure in miles and can be annoying, rocky and bumpy. the escort lost its exhaust heat guard because of them.

and as for the dogs...

a little something

2007-04-16T21:32:00.000Z

so work just too busy for me to have the time to blog, heres a remotely amusing youtube thing for anyone who is still popping over. later.

slow blogging weekend

2007-03-26T21:28:00.000Z

work and all keeping idle thumbs busy, but ive changed the interactive stuff on the right there for some amusement. football fans will especially enjoy the sport bit.

reality check

2007-03-24T00:19:00.000Z

i really wanted to continue the unprovoked attack on scottish sporting failures that i'd started the other day with the egg chasing competition; i had even started on another daft picture taking the piss out of their embarassment in another english game, exported to the colonies, cricket.

but the murder of pakistans coach, and former england great, has taken the fun out of the sport and brought the realities of life back to the fore. sport is meant to be a laugh.

the spine sums it up with this image.

why not, its doing the rounds

2007-03-24T00:17:00.000Z

belgians mock fife constabulary

2007-03-22T22:16:00.000Z

after reading exclusively here on the Y campaign about how fife police refused to chase down a stolen subaru impreza because it was carrying eggs, the belguim car manufactuers decided to poke some fun at their celtic brethren.

after collaring the crooks doing 12 mph over the forth road bridge

(have you tried going faster?) they dragged the stolen merchandise back to the low countries, melted down the loot and rebuilt the impreza.

learn more about the chocy belguim charade.

hattip to total shambles.

police defend decision not to chase the egg (anymore)

2007-03-22T19:54:00.000Z

commenting after photographs suggest that part of the £70,000 worth of stolen cadbury's easter eggs were seen been driven at high speed across st andrews famous old course, local police from the fife constabulary defended their decision not to give chase.

"ack, jiz becorse we has proof tha the eggs were bein' carried in the twoked subaru impreza along the famous st andrews bridge, does nae mean wi will act." said chief inspector pointless. "efter scotland's pathetic showing in the six nations it is national policy te nae longer chase eggs in public. anyone wanting the neds caught shud wait until they make it te france, or ireland, ack, te anywhere else where people can actually chase eggs."

bbc scotlandshire has confirmed reports that the stolen impreza was seen driving in excess of 61 mph in a 60 zone along the a91, and would normarily receive 20 drving points. the hitherto unknown leader of the scottish liberal democrats promised firm action should someone actually vote for them in may's elections: "such high powered horse-less carraiges damage our precious things with their brooms brooms and desirable ability. we would protect our trees and stop these polar bear killers; if only we had people in the cabinet in holyrood!" bemoaned nicola something.

the eggs were stolen two days ago by three masterminds who spent hours trying to out-wit the delivery lorry driver, as lazily reported by the Y campaign here.

i doubt they will eat £70,000 worth of easter eggs...

2007-03-22T16:05:00.000Z

there's something childishly amusing about the story of three plucky robbers who drove off with £70,000 worth of cadburys easter eggs.

it seems our daring triplets duped the delivery driver by telling him the lorry was shedding its load. when the driver jumped out to inspect his cargo the musketeers jumped in and drove off along with a subaru impreza gettaway car.

But they may end up eating the snacks themselves, as a Cadbury spokesman said
the eggs would be hard to sell.

reports the socialist beep... erm, does the beep really believe they are not going to find anyone in the whole of yorkshire who will buy easter eggs that almost fell off the back of the lorry? don't be stupid.

seemingly oblivious to the steaming stupidity of his own workforce (surely drivers spot stuff falling out of their lorry in their mirrors) a cadbury spokesman went right for the jugular with this crafty statement:

"The criminal fraternity are pretty thick,

not so think they can't do you out of £70,000.

Next year, the indications are that you will be £320.36 worse off.

2007-03-21T22:52:00.000Z

bugger.

just played with the budget calculater on the beep and am delightfully informed that gordon broon will be nicking an extra £320.36 in tax rises off me. this is before council tax rises are included.

here's the breakdown:

i'll loose an £156 in fuel duty but will be given a whole £5 back due to the escort not considered a bad polluter.

Fuel - this year 4802.16 - next year 4958.16 - difference £-156
Vehicle excise duty - this year 40 - next year 35 - difference £+5

the rest is made up from swindling from fags, booze and becuase i commit the heinous crime of flying. a few other increases all equate to the price of a season ticket at the boro.

cheers very much you fat bastard.

another prediction comes up trumps

2007-03-21T20:53:00.000Z

yesterday the campaign predicted this for the budget:

i reckon the middle class will get hit with hidden (stealth) taxes whilst broon will raise the tax band for the poorest. i reckon income will rise by a few pence (probs one)

today mother beeb in all her socialist glory wrote:

Chancellor Gordon Brown announced a cut in the basic income tax rate from April 2008 in a surprise move at the end of what is likely to be his last Budget.

i should be on their payroll.

some changes to note

2007-03-20T22:13:00.000Z

on the right are added a few new things to play with. along with the usual 'motor of the week', which will now be a youtube of something that amuses me there are added a blogthing quiz and a sporting moment of the week. something interactive to pass a few minutes of the day with.

there's also an email to contact the campaign should the wish become overriding.

feel free to comment below with any comments, suggestions, questions and complaints.

a total shambles indeed

2007-03-20T21:54:00.000Z

can i refer you to a blog that is not updated frequently, and involves more tourettes style posting than this campaign, for a moment? the blog is totalshambles.

the most recent post bemoans the inability of one student to climb the property ladder and strike out alone as an individual. it reads:

Judging by the TV guide tonight, I'm wishing I could afford my own place ( which I can't thanks to high student debt, low graduate salarys and runaway house prices thanks to that fucking cunt of a bastard (sorry, please excuse the language but I can't see why the people of Great Britain are obsessed with voting the dick back in) leader of the government; just so that I could get sky, cause theres fuck all on, and because of reasons outlined above, I do not have the disposable income to go out drinking tonight, despite the fact that this is St Patricks weekend (and to all NI folk obsessed with tribal sectarianism - St Patrick was not x or y, he was CHRISTIAN, in an attempt to spread christianity amongst the pagans of Ireland. This was before Henry VIII decided to fuck every girl in England...) .

oh yeah, and the blog is based in norn ireland.

so here's the thing. the thatcher government sold off council houses which gave people ownership and personnel wealth. this allowed for greater social mobility and let people move on and up. the bliar government has hit my age group with so much tax that it is simply unable to afford the same opportunities. tax reduces mobility and constrains peoples future plans. how can students with huge debts manage to get out of debt, onto the ladder and on with families and life if they're too busy paying off ridiculous student debts?

its a shame the conservatives no longer run on abolition of student debts. but then, we have done so for the last two elections and lost both times, so logic must override and a change in policy and attitude must prevail.

tomorrow is budget day. who fancies taking me on with this bet; i reckon the middle class will get hit with hidden (stealth) taxes whilst broon will raise the tax band for the poorest. i reckon income will rise by a few pence (probs one) which will bring relief to at least a million people. ironically, the way the tax system works it will also force as many out of benefits as it will more profitable to get jobs. a clever tactic if he does it. any takers?

distractions

2007-03-16T11:18:00.000Z

of which there will be many over the next few days preventing the usual weekend glut of posts, come next week i'll have another tweak with the lay-out to prevent people thinking this is one of those political blogs that keeps up with developments and comments accordingly. also, i played about with the car of the week and replaced the pictures with youtube feeds, expect more random stuff like that.

vi ses.

unlikley support for the Y campaign

2007-03-15T13:03:00.000Z

as discovered by some recent commentators this is a right winged blog with a tongue in check campaign to relax the rigid nature of the english language and allow it to be used for what it was designed for; communication. why constrain our ability to communicate around accepted modes such as recieved pronunciation, split infinitives, glottal stops and the works? there is a difference between bad english and being unable to communicate effectively.

and so it is that Y village was inundated with one email highlighting national support for this campaign coming from demos, the left wing think tank reputedly behind much of tony bliars policy.

conundrum then; not good to be getting support from such unwelcome company. the solution; spin this into an issue that crosses the ideological divide of left and right, just like the support for the nhs. nifty.

support for the Y campaign has featured in the guardian - twice, the telegraph and the mail - though judging from the comments section perhaps not the mail's readership...

still, across ideologies.

ex boro boss resigns from danish side odense

2007-03-14T22:03:00.000Z

now how about that for a headline? capturing both the boro readers, okay reader, and the danish readers. and yet, there's a scottish element thrown in too. feel free to offer me a job 'the sun'.

bruce rioch has just resigned from the danish side odense. here.

bruce will be forever remembered as the manager to pull the boro through liquidation in 1986 - ever wondered why that year was on our badge? got this from wikipedia, yes i know...

He was appointed as manager of Middlesbrough in February 1986 and his first success in management came in 1987 when he guided Middlesbrough to runners-up spot in the Third Division and promotion to the Second Division at the end of a season which had started with them locked out of Ayresome Park by the official receiver and on the verge of bankruptcy. A year later they won a second successive promotion, this time as winners of the Second Division promotion/First Division relegation playoffs. However, Middlesbrough found it difficult to adjust to the pace of top flight football and spent all season fighting a relegation battle which was lost on the last day of the season. He was sacked the following March as the Teessiders hovered just above the Second Division drop zone.

and here's the scottish element; the auld boro boss beat tony mowbray's (an auld boro player come manager in europe) hibernian side 1 - 0 last july. here.

so there you go; i got to talk about sport, the boro, scottish teams, a danish side and link them altogether. where's the beer?

some chips to go with that panther burger

2007-03-14T13:35:00.000Z

and if you manage to avoid getting mauled by the scary black panther whilst out on the hunt, and suceed in making your own bbq burgers in hysteria sauce, you can always wash it down with a bag of chips, peeled for you by an 'elderly getnleman'...

hmmm, lunch

2007-03-14T09:43:00.000Z

that time of year again folks when the big, black cats are sighted around yorkshire. one of the 'small' things i missed about the area living in scotland is that panthers were never seen pottering about fifeshire.

the local newspaper reports:

A BLACK panther has been seen prowling a remote hillside in the Yorkshire Dales, according to reports. Day-tripper David Sykes said he saw the animal between Beckermonds and Deepdale, in Langstrothdale, between Hawes and Buckden, on Sunday.

according to the police this is not uncommon:

"There are several sightings every year in the county, but we have not yet found any concrete evidence."

so, tally-ho. i'm off to find the hounds and bag me a pather burger.

would have thought they'd have targets for these things

2007-03-13T11:06:00.000Z

it's now been 25 days since the scan and we are still awaiting the results. so that's; august for the attack, january for the first check up, february for the first scan and no results by january. the nhs is truely slow at getting things done.

what we have received though is letter from the counsellor... do you remember her?

january we saw her, march we get the letter she promised to send to the gp with us circulated in. it made for interested reading.

like holocaust denyers she accused us of not accepting the condition as epilepsy. i refer you to my previous posts and will let you work out if i'm in denial. she criticised us for choosing not to begin taking the medication (popping pills to stop the brian short-circuting basically). let's ingnore the maxim of 'patients choice' for a moment and have a look at the effects of taking the drugs. they increase the risk of giving birth to a disabled child and/or miscarraige etc from 2% to 4.7%, they are a confirmation that the attack was not a one off, but a likely recurrance. patient choice allows for not taking medication that will only help avoid (not prevent) seizures and since chances of a problematic birth are more than doubled the choice becomes a personnal one. having the condition confirmed invokes large life style changes. there's the obvious; banned from driving or operating most machinery. the quirky; informing the life-guard of your condition every you go for a swim. to the every day; look around you, if you were to have a seizure right now what could hurt you as you fall? the corner of the desk? need to buy those plastice covers. the pen holders? dont want one of those babies going in your eye on the way down do you? wants on the floor? happy lying on that to have a seizure? do you cook? will the oven burn your food and start a fire whilst you have a seizure? then don't cook that particular meal unless someone else is in the house.

you see, we're still waiting to find out if it was a one off or not. all the hospital want to do is send 'er indoors to see the counsellor. councsellor's keeping themselves in a job by refering everyone to each other. because yes, that was what the letter recommended, that she seek counselling to help come to terms with the 'condition'. oh, so she can confirm the condition but those who took the tests cannot? where's the damn test results then?

NOT A CHANCE!

2007-03-13T00:39:00.000Z

maybe it was a mistake to change the header sub-title from "this is not a political blog, but a blog by someone interested in politics" to "theres' no excuse for bad grammar".

for starters it caused confusion amongst some - bill cameron seemed to have some fun missing the point. but then, regular readers may have read that debate.

secondly; my traffic is now triple what it used to be. considering this is normally a personnal communication to friends and family i find that interesting. i note too that edinburgh has provided over 26% of the hits in the last week, normally this is less than 3%. maybe my earlier point was close to the mark...

and finally, there are peeps trying to tease me to on comment on issues relating to the party in scotland. yes, i may know one or two things but that does not mean i will comment on them. have a look around the layout of this blog; my flag is firmly planted in the conservative camp, so what makes anons. think i will respond to every suggestion is confusing. if you want a serious debate on the issues then read the bloglinks i have attached for scotland. i have chosen them because i believe they give an interesting - and often polarised - take on events.

if you have a blog, and make a comment, i will respond (even weneedachange) but anons will not get that same promise.

sorry, but this is not a political blog, but a blog by someone interested in politics. may i direct you to some blogs that are political?

i like mr j mc. and just follow his links for the rest.

a solution for our over crowded prision

2007-03-12T12:22:00.000Z

this popped into my email inbox today, one of those doing the rounds. joe arpaio's campaign website here.

i'd vote for him, anyone else?

Why can't our leaders think like this . . .

Well, this is certainly an interesting take on what 'prison' is.. or should be.. gotta say.. he got my vote!! =0)

TO THOSE OF YOU NOT FAMILIAR WITH JOE ARPAIO, HE IS THE MARICOPA COUNTY SHERIFF (ARIZONA) AND HE KEEPS GETTING ELECTED OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

These are some of the reasons why: Sheriff Joe Arpaio created the "tent city jail" to save Arizona from spending tens of million of dollars on another expensive prison complex.

He has jail meals down to 40 cents a serving and charges the inmates for them. He banned smoking and porno magazines in the jails, and took away their weightlifting equipment and cut off all but "G" movies.

He says: "they're in jail to pay a debt to society not to build muscles so they can assault innocent people when they leave."

He started chain gangs to use the inmates to do free work on county and city projects and save taxpayer's money.

Then he started chain gangs for women so he wouldn't get sued for discrimination.

He took away cable TV until he found out there was a federal court order that required cable TV for jails. So he hooked up the cable TV again but only allows the Disney channel and the weather channel.

When asked why the weather channel he replied: "so these morons will know how hot it's gonna be while they are working on my chain gangs."

He cut off coffee because it has zero nutritional value and is therefore a waste of taxpayer money. When the inmates complained, he told them, "Thisisn't the Ritz/Carlton. If you don't like it, don't come back."

He also bought the Newt Gingrich lecture series on US history that he pipes into the jails.

When asked by a reporter if he had any lecture series by a Democrat, he replied that a democratic lecture series that actually tells the truth for a change would be welcome and that it might even explain why 95% of the inmates were in his jails in the first place.

With temperatures being even hotter than usual in Phoenix (116 degrees just set a new record for June 2nd), the Associated Press reports: About 2,000 inmates living in a barbed- wire-surrounded tent encampment at
the Maricopa County Jail have been given permission to strip down to their government-issued pink boxer shorts.

On Wednesday, hundreds of men wearing pink boxer shorts were chatting in the tents , where temperatures reached 128 degrees.

"This is hell. It feels like we live in a furnace," said Ernesto Gonzales, an inmate for 2 years with 10 more to go."It's inhumane."Joe Arpaio, who makes his prisoners wear pink, and eat bologna sandwiches,is not one bit sympathetic. "Criminals should be punished for their crimes not live in luxury until it's time for parole, only to go out and
commit more crimes so they can come back in to live on taxpayers money and enjoy things many taxpayers can't afford to have for themselves."

Wednesday he told all the inmates who were complaining of the heat in the tents: "It's between 120F to 130F degrees in Iraq and our soldiers are living in tents too, and they have to walk all day in the sun, wearing full battle gear and get shot at, and they have not committed any crimes, so shut your damned mouths!"

Way to go, Sheriff!

If all prisons were like yours there would be a lot less crime and we would not be in the current position of running out of prison spaces.

If you agree, pass this on. If not, just delete it.

Sheriff Joe was just re-elected Sheriff in Maricopa County , Arizona

sit down germany, the boro are the best in the world!

2007-03-11T20:20:00.000Z

england is consistant in their inability to win penalty shoot-outs, i remember italia 90 all too vividly. for the scottish readers here's a youtube of englands last attempt to play put the little round ball in the big square goal.

watching the quarter final match against man utd yesterday - wondering if we would see another replay - when i got told this little nugget:

middlesbrough f.c. have won their last six penalty shoot-outs (two coming this season alone) making them the best in the world. coming second is germany with five straight wins. this would be official - if anyone actually cared...

there you go man u; beat us over 120 minutes or we'll beat you over 10 spot kicks.

gazumping the tories

2007-03-09T13:15:00.000Z

never one to miss a trick, theo spark hoodwinks the scottish tories and releases his own manifesto; the left wing activist does not miss a beat as he calls for the return to full blooded communism:

To reduce the power of unelected assholes who spawn ridiculous legislation
purely to give themselves a sense of importance,

fed up with the governments law and order policy being 'tough on crime, tough on the causes of crime', theo calls for more rehab and counseling:

We bring back Hanging for Terrorists, serial killers, child killers and
traitors!

and it seems the current government has not gone far enough with letting all the peado's out early, theo wants this speeded up:

Prison sentences must carry the full term, parole is a joke, hard labour and
'chain gangs' cannot be written off. Good behavior will be rewarded with access
to television, internet access and 'easy duties'.

in an attempt to woo the young, energetic commie from their tree-hugging festivals theo proposes a real constitutional shake-up:

The drinking age to be raised to 21. This should slow them down.

as with all commie's theo has chosen the isolationist foreign policy which will be followed by years of inward investment before establishing diplomatic ties across nations:

We have a duty to protect the population of our ex colonies, so Mugabe must be
taken out he is destabilising Southern Africa and must be assassinated at first
chance.

naturally hes a fan of the trade unions:

Their day is over.

and pro banks:

Credit card and overdraft rates to be pinned to 2% above Bank of England base
rate. Screw the Banks!

not to mention a strong supporter of increasing incapacity benefits for those, whom, life is just too tough:

When children reach 16 they will have 3 choices, stay at school for A levels, a
2 year apprenticeship with a company, or 2 years military service.

dont think im looking forward to the scottish conservative conference in perth as much anymore ;-)

normal service resumes

2007-03-08T23:07:00.000Z

no, i do not mean this blog - that sorry saga is several posts below - i mean toccionline has returned to being interactive.

the genius that brought us the clever i can't afford my gasoline (may need to hit replay) went silent on the video and game front for a while and i eventually forgot about him. the other day i got an exicted email alerting me to the new britney spiers game.

to waste time for 5 mins go and shave brits hair.

if you're new to toccionline check out his homepage and watch some videos; he may be a leftie but hes still clever and entertaining, and well worth a look.

do you think ill get a comment from the grammar nazi this time?

news that the home office will text illegal immigrants is met with strong support

2007-03-07T17:50:00.000Z

not stolen from the spine as someone accuses me off doing.

mr eugenides is also in support of the plan.

but the plans biggest support stems from theo with this, followed later by this - or was it the other way round?

lets have a fight

2007-03-07T17:28:00.000Z

last nights valencia v inter football match followed the snarling cup and have a riot. my favourite bit is the sub who runs on, brakes a guys nose then runs away again. see if you can spot the coward...

candidate re-shuffle?

2007-03-07T14:11:00.000Z

earlier i posted that jamie sempill had quit as candidate for edinburgh central. i got curious this morning and went to check if a replacement had been found, here.

it seems fiona houston is the new candidate. she was the candidate in livingston was she not? i'm assuming livingston is in lothian - and not central - and she'll have no problems with the rankings order? anyone know?

the one thousand brake horse power crash!

2007-03-06T20:49:00.000Z

a bugatti veron is wiped out by a vauxhall astra! utter genius!

clarkypoos: this car has power

astra driver: 'er, pass us me buckies big man!

hamster: this is a familiar feeling...

a bugatti veron, as this article also points out, is a fast and powerful fucker. with 1,000 bhp it can reach speeds of 250 miles an hour (or 67,000 kilometer thingies) and costs about as much daivd millibands hair. it can out run formula one cars, it can do 0 - 60 quicker than it will take you to reach this sentence. and it crashed doing 40 in surrey!

i'm not sure why this story amuses me so much...

it seems you can get arrested for wearing a red nose

2007-03-06T14:32:00.000Z

what a legend

2007-03-06T10:36:00.000Z

jose mourinho can be annoyingly arrogant - especially when they beat boro and don't apologise - but sometimes he says the funniest things. when asked if he's worried about being sacked he responded:

"If the club decides to sack me because of bad results it's part of the game. I will be a millionaire and will get another club a couple of months later."

priceless. more here.

and for something lighter

2007-03-06T00:07:00.000Z

the spine had an amusing take on the dodgy fuel down southern way.

theo spark has an interesting answer to a simple question.

i found another visually impressive blog.

and total shambolics doubles it's posting output in one day.

we may need a change, but we dont need you

2007-03-05T15:14:00.000Z

there seems no end to the level of in-fighting some people in the conservative party will stoop too just because things are not exactly the way they want them. and if proof were needed that this happens in the scottish conserative party along comes an unhelpful, badly written and poorly argued blog out of edinburgh designed to create maximum damage so close to the elections.

the award for pointless petulance goes to the blog 'scottish tories are doomed' who presents a whole list of reasons why he doesn't like the scottish conservatives. the author claims to be a tory by the name of alan simpson, yet the comments in some of his threads cast doubt on this.

let us go through his weak arguments one by one.

in the most recent post entitled comment moderation the author responds to a comment with this little gem:

We currently have such a weak platform to stand upon as we fight this election but I do not see this changing until the manifesto is launched, I pity those that have to campaign for the party! [my emphasis]

that's just oxymoronic in the first order. of course the party is light on policy prior to a manifesto launch, that is the whole point of a manifes - to launch policy! secondly, we do have several policies out there, some announced as far back as last summer.

and here they are: Council tax cut in half for pensioners, '3 strikes and you're out' for repeat offenders, £100m towards drug rehabilitation, Saying no to the Lib-Lab Pact's road toll scheme, An eco-bonus scheme for homeowners.

my source? their website: http://www.scottishconservatives.com/manifesto.asp

on another post amusingly entitled 'serious debate' the blog entertains us further with this gem which is meant to be a reason for the party suffering:

failure to invest in the future of the party - younger and hungrier candidates.

so once again i checked the party website and guess what i found - 5 under 35 year olds standing as parliamentary candidates. and here they are: peter lyburn, jamie johnston, john lamont, bob dalrymple, derek brownlee. 35 is chosen as that is the age of the reputed alan simpson in his profile. so that's a crop of candidates all younger than this waste of fresh air and one of them is already an msp! pratt... and now for the council candidates younger than he is... on this page alone he can find 10 candidates under 30 up for election in may 2007 - 2 are incumbants. again, what a pratt.

i seriously think this alan simpson failed in an application to be a candidate and is jealous of other people's success. he probably failed as he has the reasoning of a brain dead chipmunk.

now for some more oxymoronic reasoning by this pillock. on the same post as above 'serious debate' he he he posted this...

an overstaffed and underperforming central office which has repeatedly failed to
take responsibilty for repeated by-election failures

quickly followed by...

an aging membership which is too interested in coffee mornings and attending
long and boring meetings, and too reluctant to actually get out and
leaflet. [again, my emphasis]

so is he complaining that that our membership is too old or that our membership will not listen to the younger views of scco? this guy is too stupid to explain which, but his two points cancel each other out.

on the 23rd feb this alan simpson thing had a whack at murdo fraser because he seems to have a personnal difference with party policy. the funny thing is; alan the moron seems to miss the irony of his blog. his blog is a swipe at the party he disagrees with; yet complains when a politian shows the same conviction. what a dim witted 'ucker; are you a lib dem in disguise alan?

and once more to this man's crap ability to research his facts i bring you to a post from the 21st feb; evidently our lack of policies before a manifesto launch is a bad thing. a manifesto in his mind being something other than a policy launch!!!

and to conclude. this man, in his profile describes himself as "I am more of an old school type Conservative, none of this wet Cameron style Conservatism". out of interest would that be the old school conservatism that lost us the last 3 elections? you clearly enjoy living under a labour government because you don't seem willing to embrace the 21st century. your blog is nothing but ammo for the opposition, and as long as idiots like you put the boot in to score more readers on your blog this country will continue to suffer the malaise of a labour government.

if you are a conservative; shut up. if you actually like this country, shut up. such poor blogs feed the opposition. you are the opposition.

have you ever seen them together?

2007-03-04T22:53:00.000Z

well, have you? in the same room at the same time?

eviction update

2007-03-04T17:16:00.000Z

the riots began two days ago. read more here. now watch the riots live below.

danish t.v. showing the eviction in progress. these are some pretty nasty and dangerous people the danes are attempting to remove. bbc report on the recent events here.

shopping trolley "terrifies" woman

2007-03-04T16:51:00.000Z

in what has to be the daftest story of 2007 so far, i bring you the case of the woman "terrified" by a tesco trolley.

"I was terrified," she said. "I tried to swerve away from the trolley..."

the story goes that a gust of wind blow an errant trolley in the direction of julie dearrings shitreon c2 (pictured) and scrapped the paintwork. julie is now demanding 'several hundred pounds' in compensation for damages to the car and for distress!

Mrs Dearing was unhurt and managed to stay on the road - but was left shocked and upset by the incident. The car, which was bought less than a year ago, suffered a dented front wing which will cost several hundreds of pounds to fix.

what a pathetic moron. though i do like the reporter's writing style "...[the moron] managed to stay on the road" why will it cost so much to fix a dented front wing? is her car made of gold? are shitreon's so easy to brake?

i'm still confused as to why tesco should be liable for a) another customer not replacing the trolley in the trolley bay b) the wind being, well, windy. this is simply an acident, a pure by-chance event of the kind that happens in life everyday. this woman needs to grow up and except that she can't sue someone everytime she's not happry with what life throws at her.

82 tax rises in 10 years

2007-03-03T21:03:00.000Z

yep, labour are responsible for 82 tax rises in one decade. read more here.

so where's our integrated transport system then?

2007-03-03T20:02:00.000Z

as the plans for road pricing hit the headlines within days of toni bliar so it would be "kamikazee" to do so; the campaign asks where is our integrated transport system?

all it takes is for one bad accident to close down 15 miles of the a1(m) motorway and north yorkshire turns into motorised pandamonium. thousands of cars spilled out into the surrounding villages which gridlocked most b- roads for a good hour or so. today it took me 4 and a half hours to travel what is normally a one hour drive to harrogate.

so here's the clincher; with road pricing my journey today - diverted through dozens of villages and two towns - would have cost me close to £32! £32 to travel 40 miles!!!

now that is value for money...

those crazy danes are at it again!

2007-03-02T18:52:00.000Z

life's never dull over in denmark as they lurch from one burning issue to another (pardon the pun ;-). wasn't it around this time last year they got half the muslim world burning their flags and embassies down over a few cartoons?

then last month they attempted their own italian job with mazdas!

and this month they take on some scum left wing activists as they attempt toevict some trouble-making squatters from a youth centre. 217 rioters arrested in one night, with more rioters flooding in from germany, sweden, norway and austria. danish diplomatic missions abroad are even being atacked again. read mother beep's take here, then compare to the more sedate copenhagen post here.

Police in Denmark are braced for more violence after the eviction of squatters from a youth centre in the capital Copenhagen. At least 217 people were arrested on Thursday after clashes around the Youth House (Ungdomshuset) building in the Noerrebro district. Danish Prime Minister Anders Fogh Rasmussen has condemned the rioters. Left-wing activists have occupied the building since 1982 but it was sold by the local council in 2000.

let's here it for the danish police.

daz really does get your blog whiter than white

2007-03-02T18:28:00.000Z

the old blue, narrow blog has gone. Y took the campaign in for some cosmetic surgery and dr theo spark got his scalples out; creating the picture from the paint job idea i came up, and then worked on how to tweak the html to widen the posts and created the button link. fellow campaigners will find a few more buttons down there on the right; these link to dr theo sparks other blogs (one is best not to open at work whilst the other generaly has fun at horneywood's expense). the rogue gunner also chipped in so here's a plug, and another.

so what do fellow campaigners think of the new look? good old winston churchill ready to machine gun socialists and the boro badge... pure quality. 'the live with it' replaced by some good advice too.

take the sleasyjet

2007-03-02T13:47:00.000Z

yesterday, about half four in kings cross i was reminded of why i always avoid using the train.

Y: single to darlington, please.

fat ticket seller in kings cross: open return?

Y: err, no. just a one way single.

fat ticket seller: that'll be £102.50 please.

Y: for a single? to darlington?

fat ticket seller: correct.

Y: how long does the journey take?

fat ticket seller: about three hours.

Y: so you're charging me £1 for every 2 minutes?

fat ticket seller: well you need to bare in mind it's about 200 miles north.

Y: and you need to bare in mind that's £1 for every 2 miles.

fat ticket seller: may i suggest sir tries taking the plane?

now, did he advise i use his competitors or was he politely telling me to fuck off?

take the fat man's advice; if drivings not an option travel by plane, even if it's sleasyjet.

they've clearly never been to the western general

2007-02-28T16:20:00.000Z

today the executive is back slapping like crazy after the recent nhs waiting times have been published and the scottish press duly reported headlines like this.

the royal infirmary is credited as being one of the worst in the country yet the scotsman felt the need to start their story with a spot of back scratching.

and when scottish papers see through the labour lies they do so in support of the nats.

but the fact remains that in the lothian region alone 6,000 patients have been removed from the waiting list and placed on the reserve-waiting list, so duh, the fdged figures are bound to look good. and let’s not forget that last June, the bma alleged that some nhs managers had asked for certain cancer surgeries to be postponed so more minor operations like wisdom teeth treatment could be done within waiting target times.

go private people - especially if you run the risk of being sent to the general western in edinburgh!

by the wayside

2007-02-28T15:21:00.000Z

sometimes travelling can be fun, sometimes it can get too much; milton keynes, edinburgh, st andrews, halifax, leeds, marsden and guisborough. close to 2,000 miles in almost 2 weeks, the little motor didn't know what hit it. london tomorrow...

since the last post the boro nearly got humped; whilst england did in the egg chasing.

micheal meacher goes against gordon broon and the salford chipmunk begins her scurry for deputy.

del boy's reliant sells for £44,000 - the price of an rs4 - and is duly promoted to car of the week whilst drivers in northampton try riding on ethanol, tsk tsk.

sometimes true life is why people turn...

2007-02-19T23:32:00.000Z

today the times announces that doctors feel nulabour have 'ucked up the nhs whilst in a totally un-related moment not designed to counter such bad news tony bliar announces new targets etc etc etc and so on.

ironic then that the Y campaigns' negative experience with edinburgh's general western hospital continues. ironic, as in, today the nhs dominates the news and today 'er indoors and i agree the nhs is useless.

so, the earlier post.

now today's post.... i deliberatly waited to post this in order to calm down...

firstly; the general western really, really hates cars. when they send out an appointment letter they nicely send out a little map to let you know where, within the metropalis of western general, the neurology department is. it even tells you were to park. well, try navigating their little narrow roads only to stop at every "one way only" sign and road painting. eventually we gave up and tried to park in the first car park we found.

security guard: "where are you going?"

Y: "into the carpark because we might be late"

security guard: "which department are you looking for?"

Y: "neurology"

security guard: "i'm sorry sir; this car park is for cancer patients only. you need to park in bays 7 or 8 only"

Y: "oh, okay. which way?"

security guard: "down this road sir, take a left and follow it's path going round to the right."

Y: "but i can't go that way because the signs say it's one way only"

security guard: "oh, that doesn't come into force until the 23rd. let me just double check."

eventually we parked up and found the now familiar reception area. this time our wait to be called was much shorter than last time. a young trainee walked us to the check-up room; along the way he politely chatted away, talking to us about what we should expect to encounter. flashing lights, induced epilepsy. he subtley asked a few 'patient history questions' such as; when was your last attack, are you on medication, nice weather today... for a newbie he was pretty good - shame i can't remember his name so i can say thank you in this, my own way.

in the room - a little disappointing - we found normal things. a small camera to record the treatment. an old nhs underfunded computer to track the results. a bed, strange paper style sheets covered it. 'er indoors was free to sit on these sheets, but as soon as she moved they were promptly disposed off and another replaced it. a sign of the times i suppose. a nice clean blue lino floor. a poster on the notice board letting all staff know that if they performed a basket lift they would be severly disciplined. another sign of the times? i guess i was hoping for something out of csi.

the treatment itself was routine. dump a load of goey stuff on her head where the plugs would go and lay her down in the correct pose. the problem was; not the fact the attack(s) began in august and only now are we seeing signs of the nhs doing something.... no no no. the problem was the staff!

seriously; last time we went the building was shoddy (see above). but the dodgy lino was replaced. there were no patients in the corridors and everything seemed as one would expect; a hospital full of poorly people being treated.

we were just so lucky as to get the most ignorant fucking useless doctor on the planet..!.!.!

oh how things change.

the doctor, well. where do i begin?

during the attachment of the many little probes in, walked this young girl. the trainee guy looked young; we're in our mid twenties and boy he did look young. at least he answered honestly; if he didn't know the answer he said so and went and checked. this girl looked "fourteen" as 'er indoors said. the young girl waltzed in, wearing the same clothes as the trainee. didn't announce who she was; just proceeded to whisper to the trainee. she got involved a little, but generally just whispered a lot.

the whole e.e.g. went on. all the time the young thing just whispered. the lights flashed, the computer monitered, the camera recorded and all along the young thing whispered.

here's the bone... anyone with t'interweb connection can find out what to expect with an e.e.g. but patients do not like doctors who ignore their patients. this young thing was actuallt the trainer to the trainee... how where we to know? no introductions, no name badge, no reference. if i see her again she will not be allowed anywhere near 'er indoors. not with a barge pole.

for the majority of the whole scan we were convinced there were two trainee's in the room and not a single doctor. i am also convinced that this concern / query affected the results of the scan; 'er indoors admitting she was glad i challenged the young thing to announce who she was.

if any doctors are reading this then please, please, please remember that patients are not numbers on a target list, they are real people. people with concerns and fears. when you forget this you make us hate you, hate you so much. all you had to do was announce yourself, or maybe not whisper everything you said. do doctors really forget that patients are human too; do they just not care; or do we keep getting the crap ones?

blogging will be light the next few days. i have to catch up on the work i've missed over this debacle...

it's simple science

2007-02-19T17:25:00.000Z

light travels faster than sound; which is why some people seem bright until they speak.

what a moron.

now watch an attack ad.

that sunday thing

2007-02-18T22:47:00.000Z

it seems the vogue amongst bloggers to have some odd round-up of other blogs and highlight each other musings and so on - back sctratching is what the campaign calls it.

here's the campaigns version:

the only round up worth caring about it by scottish blogging roundup - it does exactly what it says on the tin.

chameleons have a clever arguement about why some laws, with good intent, are actually very bad laws.

world of jack has been added as link due to entertaining me; stalking jacky mcconnell with wit and patience - i couldn't follow a single minded campaign with such conviction and cleverness.

and good auld tel has been added because he really is the best advertisement for the destruction of socialism ever.

wife in the north has been removed. i have promoted this blog here, here but because of this i don't have the same affection for it. somehow it was more gripping when anonymous... i notice too that it is now .com not blogspot.com...

and the good lord jamie sempill has also been deleted due his resigning as a scottish conservative candidate for edinburgh.

scottish lib dem pre-manifesto

2007-02-18T17:36:00.000Z

makes for an interesting read. interesting also that the main stories to come out this weekend's conference was their call for more community police and not about any of the crazy things they've suggested below.

pages 4 to 9 are pure fantasy. they want to get rid of nuclear energy and have scotland powered entirely by renewable energy by 2050.

in 2004 1,043 wind turbines produced a mere 0.4% of energy consumption; a few million more might replace nuclear energy! solar power in the uk is unlikely to be very successful, sunny weather in britain? hydro-electricity only contributes 2% of needs, the entire british coast covered in wave turbines would not replace nuclear.

the crazy buggers also want to switch to "local energy" and talk of de-centralised energy. have these people not heard of engineers?

It is a hoot when you realise that the creation of the national grid out of more
localised distribution networks before WWII reduced spare capacity from 85% to
15%, a capital saving which represented 75% of the cost of creating the national
grid. And generating costs were cut by 25%.

page 5 even insinuates that scotland exports green technology to denmark... erm no. that's a lie. but then the lib dems are good at lying. the truth dear liers is that denmark is leagues a head of scotland on this one.

there's something admirable about pages 10 - 15, even if a little mis-guided. there is lots of intent for improving the lives of young people. however, the lib dems have proved they are not capable of fulfilling these aims. they have been in power for two parliaments and still have failed to do anything they promise in this document. secondly, there is no point calling for more football and basketball leagues on page 11 when the lib dems are openly against competitive sports.

their plans for the economy seem blinkered by the volume of jobs renewable energy will provide and thus concentrate largely on research; read page 18. if i was one of the thousands of people working in the oil industry i would be worried by this document.

on page 26 they call for stricter controls on cars around schools... good job for me that i only pass four schools on the way to work. maybe the lib dems will build extra roads so i can avoid schools. if they don't and restrict me from taking this route i will be forced to travel further due to these de-tours; that means more carbon emissions and all that other stuff eco-mentalists claim is contributing to global warming.

the lib dems are wrong on this; some people have to drive and legislating to increase their journey is plain stupid.

page 30 calls for more tax. oh dear...

people make me laugh

2007-02-18T14:41:00.000Z

i've commented a couple of times about how i enjoy reading the blog 'wife in the north' - i probably enjoy it so much as i know the area she writes about as i grew up next door to it. also, i hate london and didn't particularly enjoy living in edinburgh and find cities as unfamiliar as she does the countryside. in a way the blog is the reverse of my own thoughts and experiences.

now the author has been rewarded for being better than the rest of us with a book deal worth around £70,000, good on her. her experiences of living in an unfamiliar world will be serialised by viking penguin books.

amusingly on the times website the comments section covering the story have attracted the p.c. brigade and the jealous. some people don't seem willing to let others be successful.

the first comment comes from someone who didn't appreciate wife in the north's opinion of health visitors... funny that, blogs containing opinions. that's the appeal of them. on the right i have linked blogs whose broad opinions i disagree with but read them as they are, at least, well written. if someone has a negative experience they are allowed the opinion on this. health visitors may well be generally good, but if there's a crap one then there's a crap one.

the second comment seems to come from someone who has slaved away to get a publishing deal herself and thus far failed. complaining that someone who has already been successful, and did so through unorthodox channels is poor form; in a way succeeding outside the box makes it more of an achievement.

now they've taxed you to death, they want you dead

2007-02-18T14:09:00.000Z

one more step for eco-terrorists, one big blow for everyone else.

i thought nulabour idiocy on the motorway had reached its zenith when they demanded every child under 5 foot be strapped up in booster seats forcing families with more than two children to buy bigger motors to accomodate the extra space requirement. bigger motors, of course, condemed as planet killers by environmentalists and are thus uber-taxed. they legislated to force you to step up and be taxed more; brilliant.

now though they want to turn the lights off and let you crash in the dark. some numpty has decided that turning off the street lights in britain will have the effect of saving the universe so that is what nulabour will duly due.

by the time the trials are up and running 10% of the country's streetlights will be switched off the save the planet. the governments own findings argue that street lights reduce nighttime accidents by 30%. so they are knowgingly putting your life in danger!

"please come again"

2007-02-18T03:13:00.000Z

some say i stole this from theo; they lie :-)

they really do think we're stupid

2007-02-16T17:10:00.000Z

today the mighty home minister john reid announced he would build another 8,000 prison places.

last week tony bliar boasted "We built another 20,000 prison places." meaning this labour government have provided these places.

and then the mighty john reid goes over to south london; where 4 teenagers have recently been shot and chimes that there has been a huge reduction in crime whilst labour have been in power.

erm... from the top.

those 8,000 prison places will not be ready until 2012. that's over 5 years away! the prison population did "not start rising last wednesday" you ignorant fool, they have been going up for over 20 years. so you mean we have to suffer because of your short-sightedness? god i hope that every paedo and rapist that gets let out because of your idiocy takes the time to butt fuck you!

20,000 new prison places emperor bliar? really? is that right? are you sure now? you fucking moron. the only extra prison places you have the credit for are in bronzefield and peterbrough; the other seven were commissioned or being built by the previous tory government. that's before 1997 you fuckwit. i hope and pray every night that you get arrested for this 'cash for peerages' fraud and that they stick you in your own special prison. one so bloody small you cannot stand and then we'll hoist you above the gates of 10 downing street as a warning for all future prime ministers; do not fucking lie, cheat and abuse this country!

and our dear john again; who walked to the devasting scene of murder and gun crime and proclaimed that crime has fallen. you moronic little bastard; gun crime has doubled! what arrogance of this man who tells the bereaved family of a recently murdered son that crime is down when the only crime they give a fuck about has gone up?!? after you've been brutally raped by the same people you've happily set free to pray on our children, mr reid, i hope someone takes these guns and blows your balls off! you slimey, lying, two faced animal. there truly is no-one so evil hearted as you; playing politics with a bereaving family....

i suppose it keeps them off the street

2007-02-16T13:48:00.000Z

have you heard the one about three little old ladies from county durham who knitted jumpers for penguins in australia?

well you have now.

competition time

2007-02-16T13:27:00.000Z

our tel has been up to his usual. this time he's insinuating that our soliders lack intelligence and the media never write the truth about them - and to think he started off his post with a anti-israeli rant. legend.

for those who enjoy watching arrogance get verbally tongue tied have a read of terry kelly's latest reason not to vote labour whilst those who enjoy seeing arrogance get beat up read the comments.

oh yeah; the competition is to find out what exactly he is trying to say and/or the point of his post because i'm clearly not up to his heavyweight level.

are you reading her yet?

2007-02-16T00:30:00.000Z

if not, then you are missing something powerful. this is what makes a good blog. if you want a daily blog that doesn't have the bizarrness of this one, then bookmark this. for the newbies go back a few weeks and follow the story.

hats off

2007-02-16T00:17:00.000Z

to ada mason who lived to 111 years old! take a moment and think about that. she was born in 1896. my degree involved studying events more recent than that.

wishes and respect to an amazing achievement.

read more here.

new setback for wembley stadium

2007-02-15T14:29:00.000Z

just when we all thought wembley stadium was on course to be finished some time this decade, someone went and let john prescott jump up and down nearby; watch this!

am i missing the point?

2007-02-15T09:18:00.000Z

all day yesterday the radio talked of how british children were the least well-off out of 21 industrialised countries with the nanny states of scandinavia battling with holland for "most well-off" - i do love officialdom speak! the beep even have a feature on it.

here's the thing; 3 out of the 6 criteria involved smoking, drink and sex... erm, how does a lot of that make one unhappy?

last night i had a conversation with a daily mail reading type who was bemoaning the loss of youth and the decline in something or another. when i asked her about her mothers childhood i was treated to stories of the jarrow march, life down the pits and being married off at 16! married off! the kids of scumdee may jumping in the sack earlier than they should be, but at least they get to choose who with...

the young 'uns today may be worse (pick category) than the whipper-snappers of the 50's and 60's who probably never had it so good; but be it a labour or conservative government, i would sooner but a teenager today than at any other time - and since greater prosperity beckons living here than elsewhere in socialist europe i would sooner be schooled here.

the quality of life website.

it's catching!

2007-02-14T23:55:00.000Z

earlier today i posted about a district council group leader being de-selected.

this was followed by a scottish conservative candidate confirming he had resigned.

and now an mp has been de-selected! crickey, is there a cull going on or is this just a random day?

Sir Patrick Cormack, one of the longest-serving MPs and the Conservative who
secured the biggest swing for his party at the last election, failed by a narrow
margin to be readopted at a meeting of his Staffordshire South constituency
association. Sir Patrick, 67, an MP since 1970, is expected to appeal to a full
meeting of his 500-strong constituency party to overturn the executive decision.
His majority is 8,847. Sir Patrick’s views have not always gone down well
with the Tory Right. He supports the Iraq war and tried to build consensus on
contentious issues, leading cross-party delegations to ministers.

n.b. de-selection is a poor term; the correct term is "not reselected", but ack - the result is the same.

scottish conservatives resignation?

2007-02-14T12:02:00.000Z

jamie sempill has resigned as candidate for edinburgh central, or is that just a rumour?

check out his site on www.vote4sempill.com.

update 1347; confirmed. scottish conservatives candidate for edinburgh central, jamie sempill, has resigned, though scco don't seem in a hurry to tell anyone. thoughts on who his replacement will be? i can't think of any local councillors for that area and the party is strongest in the south and west so no local choice from there.

biscuits

2007-02-14T09:29:00.000Z

yesterday on bbc news 24 they mentioned that the uk's oil production is set to decrease by 10% over the next few years. will the snp still continue with their daft claims that north sea oil will more than fund an independant scotland?

yesterday i defrag'd the auld man's laptop - it took 7 hrs!!! 82% of his hard-drive is full, largely of holiday pics. random.

yesterday i watched an association de-select their district council group leader; i can do this job for a long time and never see that again...

so, just what is noel gallagher's favourite biscuit?

the french lurch left and europe moves right

2007-02-12T13:53:00.000Z

she may be attractive but royale's also a flipping nutjob.

whilst europe moves to the right (sweden the most recent country to elect a centre-right party) the french socialist party lurches ever more into insanity. when will these people learn, socialism does not work.

the best post for a long time

2007-02-12T13:36:00.001Z

comes from mr. eugenides with his ode to patsy - even the picture is perfect.

the nhs has been in the news again with the closure of yet more, yet more broken promises and yet more nulabour spin. i was going to post but now i don't see the point, a great summary is available elsehwere.

here's a taste:

But we can be sure of one thing; Patricia Hewitt is a lying cunt with a soul as black as the pits of hell, and her stewardship of the NHS has been a fully-fledged disaster. There are no more words left to describe her; no more gruesome punishments I can imagine for this horrendous woman.

take a seat and give his post from saturday 10 feb a read.

peter hain is a dangerous man

2007-02-12T09:44:00.000Z

the northern irish secretary, peter hain, has decided not to take an interest in the affairs of ulster but instead concentrate on his deputy leadership contest with an outrageous statement at the weekend.

he's called for city bonuses to be taxed and regulated by the government with two-thirds going to charity. apparently these bonuses

were fuelling envy and social discontent

really?

first off; the government already taxes these bonuses - it's called income tax which is at 40% for high earners. so the government already gets 40% and now want another 66%...

secondly city bonuses are exactly that - bonuses. if middlesbrough football club are wanting to buy a new player who as the target of other clubs i expect middlesbrough to offer the higest wage to attract the best players. does mr hain object to this? if he doesnt then he cannot object to city bonuses as they are the same thing; big firms paying large somes for the best staff.

finally, the financial sector is one of the industries where britain can genuinely claim to be a world leader and the country benefits hugely from the revenue raised. for hain to threaten all this because he doesnt like to see successful people benefit from their labour is reckless and irresponsible.

i know he's making a lurch to the left to shore up some support for his deputy leadership campaign, but he should be careful. inward investment is scared off by such dangerous talk; and sounding like a socialist helps no-body.

the truth be exposed

2007-02-11T02:32:00.000Z

http://theospark.blogspot.com/2007/02/loony-bomber.html#links

those dems seem set to make things interesting

2007-02-10T17:53:00.000Z

a rare compliment for the left; but it seems like the democrats are intent on making things interesting as they drag american politics into the 21st century and away from the rich, white male zone it has become entrenched in.

first there came a woman, now comes an african american.

good on them i say.

who do you trust most to run the economy?

2007-02-10T11:42:00.000Z

the party that ran up a £23 million debt or the party that can balance the books?

read here.

i wonder how their review is coming along.

glorious news!

2007-02-09T23:05:00.000Z

i'm told that i am told this every year and react with the same glee... nothing like a dose of groudhog day style happiness. anyways, 'er indoors has just informed me that the danes don't celebrate valentine's day! excellent, both my wallet and i breathe a sign of relief!

and for those unlucky enough to have to spend a weeks pay on buying something just to avoid being nagged should think about buying this, link stolen from theo spark.

an ickle barney

2007-02-09T23:03:00.000Z

someone told me i write about football too much; tough :-)

fake dr gillian mcfuck

2007-02-09T22:57:00.000Z

i once called her the most annoying person on t.v.

for those who have met terry.

2007-02-07T21:10:00.000Z

as part of the terry watch campaign i advise you have a look at this astute observation.

compare and contrast

2007-02-07T14:46:00.000Z

labour wants to fingerprint the kiddies.

conservatives believe this nonesense won't work, is a waste of money and an invasion of privacy.

i'll leave you to make up your mind...

conservative think the nhs is in trouble.

labour deny everything.

new candidate website launched

2007-02-06T20:58:00.000Z

the scottish conservative candidate for livingston has just launched her website: www.fionahouston.com. fiona is could be described as one of goldie's girls - 3 of the 8 regions elected a female as first in the rankings under the party's one member one vote system, and fiona didn't do too badly either.

i envisenge several changes over the next few days but until then the site is near completion. spread the word, or indeed let me know if you spot any mistakes as we test the new additions.

you vs the rest of the country!

2007-02-06T13:49:00.000Z

so who - like me - has only just discovered politicalsurvey2005 ? for those uninitiated you answer a series of questions on your politics and it generates a series of tables and charts to plot your beliefs/answers against the country. the country's answers come from polling for the 2005 election.

i was not surprised with the results it for me but i was very surprised to them compared against the country at large.

the first graph gives a snap shot of where you are on thee auld axis of beliefs. in this graph the vertical line ranges from socialist to free-market. i came very free-market, more than the majority. across the horizontal the range is from internationalist/rehabilitation through to hang'n'flog 'em and eurosceptic. i came almost dead centre - with the rest of the country! wierd.

the analysis goes on:

The results on this page refer only to your position on the first and most important axis. Positions on this axis describe your views on crime and punishment, Europe, and other transnational issues including immigration and international law.

it seems that 37.8% of men and 36.0% of women are to the right of me on these issues. now i find this quite surprising; i always knew i could be a tad liberal on these issues but i hadn't realised i was dead centre with the country and that a third are more right than i! curious. i wonder what questions pushed me to the centre; i have a tacit support for the death pentaly for the likes of hindley and shipman et al and am definately pro custodial sentences over rehabilitation (asbo's assured to get me going). maybe it was because i don't really mind about differing cultures/sexuality and all that stuff governments shouldn't be getting involved with.

moving on:

The results on this page refer only to your position on the second and less important axis. Positions on this axis describe your views on public and private involvement in the economy, international trade, redistributive taxation... and Iraq.

a whopping 84.3% of the country polled to the left of me with only 4.2% of those claiming to be conservatives to the right of me on these issues and only 2.2% of my age to the right. well, that's settled then.

the country is with me on the social issues but needs re-educating on everything else! :-)

anyone else slightly surprised by the results they got?

a quick round up of what's interesting on mother beep

2007-02-05T23:27:00.000Z

watch out hillary clinton.

jacky mcconnell thinks we're stupid and that this will have any affect. where's the real policies boyo? if i walk to the pizza shop how will that help the environment? my pizza stills comes in unrecycled cardboard, the pizza shop still leaves the door open to be more inviting to visitors - forcing it to keep the heating on more. pillock. trains are still more expensive than car ownership! and you're supposed to be the socialist. retard.

but then why should we listen to eco-wankers anyway?

my kind of animal!

labour's third overhaul of the education system in a decade! obviously they are too stupid to learn from the a.s. level fiasco. muppets.

new cf blog launched

2007-02-05T23:21:00.000Z

richmond (yorks) cf now have a blog. it needs ironing out but we all know these things take time. spread the word to anyone you think might be interested. the blog can be found here. and no, i'm not the person whose name is listed on it... ;-)

this weeks top motor

2007-02-05T22:10:00.000Z

was meant to be some ford but with the moving and changing of email addresses i have absolutely no idea where the uck the picture is.... email again for next week...

instead the campaign team brings you the bugatti veron, featured in yesterday's top gear, and there are 3 simple reasons to worship this car.

oh, and since the world and his wife tuned in to top gear to see a grown man stop a car dead from over 300 mph with his head - up from its usual 4 million viewers - i have this special message [naught words] fuck off if you sat there tutting and stroking your beard you knitted-jumper wearing wazzock, we don't all think that fun is hugging trees. cars are machines and pushing the boundaries is what humans do, if it were up to you we would still be sat in fucking caves wondering why the missus is pissed that you hug shrubs more than you do her, pricks.[/naughty words].

the 3 reasons are:

it can go over 250 mph.

it comes with 1,000 bhp, my escort has about 12...

it costs so much that i will happily marry whatever animal, mineral or vegitable that can afford one.

if you have a car you want to see adorned on this blog send a pic to boardman [dot] r [at] btinternet [dot] com. give a reason(s) to help the biog bit out, otherwise i'll employ google...

he he

2007-02-04T20:34:00.000Z

not stolen from world of jack, not at all... ;-)

a triumverate of female leaders, led by the glamorous royal.

2007-02-04T19:18:00.000Z

yum yum - oh come on, she is pretty attractive... maybe...

the 'news review' in the scottish version of the sunday times today asks 'will women rule the world' and reports on the possibilty that hillary clinton will take the democratic nomination in america joing angela merkel from germany as her country's leader. it seems also that france might join them with segolene royal "courting the french voters".

firstly, just imagine how entertaining it would be if boris johnston was british prime minister and he had to deal 'professionaly' with 3 women? secretaries running for cover everywhere...

secondly, what an interesting world we might live in. trying to avoid the usual sexism complaints here it is fairly accepted that women are less belligerent. unlike bliar who has declared war more times than any since days of empire.

sadly, the article promised much in the sense it might be illuminate the world of politics and the female role - it did try somewhat - but i felt it concentrated too much on their respective looks and femininity. has anyone else read the article? does it matter as much as 4 columns in a two page spread on what clothes they wear, what hairstyles they have and so on?

take this: "In common with Clinton and Merkel, Royal looks far more attractive today than she did a decade ago,.."

i have heard much made of cameron's supposed good looks and i vaguely remember bliar having the 'good looks' edge over john major (couldn't resist that one) but did the issue matter as much for them as it appears to do for clinton, royal and merkel? do women have to wory more about their looks than men in politics?

vis-a-vis the pic: i just didn't expect such humour from the times, will i still regard as stuffy.

have you met terry yet?

2007-02-04T11:26:00.000Z

spend a few minutes to meet terry - a typical labour/socialist councillor representing east renfrewshire council in scotland. he's the kind of socialist you get all over the west of scotland and the north of england. he's also a good reason for not voting labour. note how he even labels himself a socialist.

note also in his post on the second he wrote this about those who argue against him:

years ago before blogging, used to get their kicks by writing anonymous poison
pen letters particularly to vulnerable people, ( someone is watching you type of
thing ) I suppose though that blogging provides a kind of safety valve for them,
who knows what some of them might get up to if they couldn't take out their
frustrations in this way. I wonder if the figures for certain kinds of crime
have dropped since the advent of blogging? there is the possibility of course
that figures for these things might go up when some folk start blogging and get
themselves into a state of, well, what kind of state ?

now meet those poison pen writers who would otherwise be committing crimes if it weren't for their computers: nb i have tried to ensure a range of political opinions here inc. ukip, tory and snp. read their post and those they link too.

the entertaining devils kitchen, the colourful doctor vee, then there's clairwil and here, one of terry's constituents in right for scotland, mr macnumpty and again here.

is terry really expecting us to believe that all these peeps from across the specturm have mental issues and are potential criminals? or is it just that terry kelly is a bloody good advert for the destruction of socialism?

avoid clever dicks - at all cost

2007-02-03T22:46:00.000Z

for they serve the worst food on the royal mile and half their bar staff are stoned - usually amusing but not when you see your food go from table to table before they realise the only ones with knifes and forks may, perhaps, just be the table waiting for food..!

'er indoors thought her chicken kiev tasted like the food she got at her old uni digs - says alot - whilst i had lumpy mashed potato which splashed the water-like gravy all over the shop everytime you tried to cut it. i mean, cutting mashed tatties, ffs. the nacho's cost over 5 quid taking the bill to near £27 which is more expensive than the worlds end where food tastes like food.

and you thought denmark was boring...

2007-02-03T16:35:00.000Z

Copenhageners out for a stroll Sunday evening had to duck for cover when a stolen white Mazda 121 charged down the Strøget walking street and torpedoed the main entrance of Illum department store.

does this make me a democrat?

2007-02-02T19:23:00.000Z

it's an american quiz so not wholly relevant - ie i believe in the nhs and "the line below which we cannot allow our poor to fall" - thus answering questions on this obviously swung the socialist total. would be interesting to see one set up for british politics...

You Are 48% Capitalist, 52% Socialist

While you are definitely sympathetic to a free economy, you also worry about the less fortunate.
Wealth and business is fine, as long as those who are in need get helped out too.
You tend to see both the government and corporations as potentially corrupt.

Are You a Socialist or Capitalist?

did hell just freeze over?

2007-02-02T13:42:00.000Z

but it seems that england have finally beat the auzzies at cricket! we didn't just beat them, we won by 92 runs which is quite a respectible score in a one dayer...

anyone else thinking 'bloody typical' or 'about ucking time'? still, at least we can now say it wasn't a complete whitewash down under.

and on the sports news massimo maccarone - that utter arse - who cost boro £8 million and scored an average 1 goal in 4 was finally sold the other week. i let it go by without a tirade of "get lost you useless ucker" style comments as he did score a couple of important goals last season. however, he's found time to call boro's most successful manager all sorts and blame his unpopularity on teeside on somone with more sense than to play that shower of turd! the cheek! "i'm crap and it's all your fault"

his agent is now saying he was mis-quoted. rest assured you bald, incompetent wanker that i am not mis-quoted in saying that when i learn to make moving images and other fancy flash i will dedicate a day to having you strung up to a yard arm and the £20,000 a week you earned on the subs bench slapped out of you, you amoeba brained prick.

new links on the right there

2007-02-01T23:21:00.000Z

the campaign has a rather limited links section. this is probably because i agree with what cassilis said. i came across the depth of blogging in my last job as an ecampaigner where i needed to keep an eye and what was being said/reported/etc and give feedback. i liked the ranting ability it gave. so those who accuse me of being selective with the links should know that i only link to those i genuinely read daily for whatever reason. below are a few more i've found myself checking out daily.

doctorvee - who i've added as a scottish blog, someone let me know if i'm ucked here. i may not agree with everything he writes but i like the fact he seems to think before blogging. i just get a bee in my bonnet and go for it. also a visually impressive layout to his blog.

theo spark - when i first came across his site i honestly thought i'd came across a porn fest, no -prizes for guessing why i returned - but alas, i just caught him on a booby heavy day. it is an amusing mix of tits and politics and i must confess i like his 'daily totty' section so much i stole the premise - look to the top right to see my more sedate version.

wife in the north - so far the best blog i have found. her language is first class and the visions she describes so succintly are amazing. she appears to be the train wreck caused by middle class cockney running into typical northern england countryside. vivid, entertaining and thought provoking. being from the country in the north, and only having lived in the country (university included) all my life except in edinburgh for a year where i experienced the 'fish out of water' sensation she is having now i may be promoting this blog more than its worth. but i like it.

and a special mention for the funniest fucker i've spotted so far.

the spine - i dont really read his blurp as i don't find them as funny as his pictures. so many times i've been tempted to nick a pic or too and use them. actually i think my facebook page is full of his artwork. ack, he'll never know...

brilliant management

2007-02-01T13:38:00.000Z

some have argued that the current "crisis" with the home office - i've actually lost count of how many there are now - is part of nulabour's utter inability to organise a pish-up in a brewery and that the lack of prison places is a disgrace.

has no-one else wondered if it wasn't a clear and clever policy by nulabour instigated way back when the cash for honours investigation began last spring? so far over 90 people have been interviewed with 4 arrested (lord cashpoint, bliar's advisor ruth turner, labour donor chris evans - the other one - and some head teacher). emperor bliar himself has now been 'interviewd' for a second time.

they're clearly guilty of something so the campaign is wondering if the prison places "crisis" is not a clever attempt to avoid being sent down the jeffery archer way.... if it is then it utter brilliance, commit a crime then re-write the law to ensure you don't get done for it...

maybe they're just addicted to gambling..?

have the scots got a point?

2007-02-01T13:11:00.000Z

one of the many anti-english rants i heard when living in scotland was how terribly awful it is that the media only concentrate on english matters and rarely what's happening north of the border. those possessed with minimal intellectual powers even use this as a reason to be pro independance. i just dismissed this as people not realising that more happens in england and thus there's more interesting things to talk about than crofting.

sometimes i pointed out that it was not a pro english bias but a pro southern english bias. watch match of the day; northern clubs are usually the last to be shown whilst we are forced to watch a drab goalless draw between west ham and eastenders.

afterall, north east news tonight is about as dull as the rabbit-fondling eco-nonsense shown on bbc scotland. however, the southern english bias is even more noticeable from 'ere up north.

all local media are reporting that in the recent match between the finest team in football and portsmouth the boro were lucky not to lose and our stand in goalie made a string of good saves. the london pish are reporting that if it wasn't for one super-dooper save by the portsmouth goalie in the last minute boro would have won... erm... say what now?

those who bothered to struggle through the plethora of airtime spent on the southern teams to get to the boro game would have seen umpteen shots by portsmouth and only two by the boro. the so called physics defying save by their goalie was accomplished without him even leaving the ground. the daily torygraph argued that, on account of this save, he should be playing for england.

the scots have a point but only a little one; for they forget that england begins at the cheviot hills and those controlling the media think england ends at the m25.

i wonder which list we are on...

2007-01-31T15:49:00.000Z

there is much talk of nhs waiting lists and there is much talk of hospital targets. tories criticise whilst nulabour tell us we've never had it so good.

pleased then, back in august, when 'er indoors took a turn that the ambulance managed to find us on a country lane in the middle of fifeshire in under 15 minutes from the phone call. even more impressed by the speed at which she was diagnosed, treated as asked if she wanted to stay the night or go home to rest.

not so pleased that it took until december to see a consultant and find about the treatment the doctors' believe is best. not overly impressed to discover her gp was not notified for over a month.

pleased that within weeks of seeing a consultant in december an appointment was made for mid january to have the mri and cat scans.

not at all pleased with the sight of edinburgh's western general hospital. a dirty concrete mess with narrow walls and no floor. okay, they had a floor, from the entrance we went in all the way to the neurological department in fact. but it had no lino. it had been removed. what was left was the green sticky material they use to affix said lino to the floorboards. patches of this green sticky stuff had worn off allowing pools of water to accumulate after the cleaners had wiped the floor.

certainly not pleased to see an elderly man in a bed, in the corrider of sticky green floor without a medical atendee, and only a few yards away from a cleaning cupboard where the orderly had absent mindedly left a bucket of dirty swill by the doorway. i had thought about taking a picture but then it occured to me that his indignatoin was great enough without some whippersnapper taking photos.

not pleased to discover that it was not for the mri and/cat cat scan we were summoned - its seems we are not on that list yet. in fact, we had waited two months, not for futher examinations, but to see a counsellor who said things like "it's more common than people think" "you shouldn't feel worried" "you can talk to me". we didn't stay long. we in that room less than we were in the waiting room. it seems we discovered yet another layer of beaucracy in the nhs.

said counsellor promised she would place 'er indoors on the list for a scan and would get back to us that day. that day was yesterday and we still have not heard from them. it seems we are on a waiting list to receive a phone call.

so which waiting list are we one. we are clearly on one; but is it to have a scan, receive a phone call, to see another waste of time counsellor or to get the prescription. 6 months later and still no prescription (which we're told will be a form of steroids, quality).

when someone suffers an epileptic fit they are band from driving for one year. at this rate 'er indoors will be legally allowed to drive again before the nhs finally declare her, legally, as an epileptic.

nulabour can say what they want. users of the nhs know it is a total shambles. if they don't believe me speak to 'er indoors, who is danish. and the danes know what a world class health system looks like. best i don't repeat her verdict on all this...

if newcastle is remote then what do they think about scotland?

2007-01-31T14:41:00.000Z

a late start to posting today as i've spent all morning in hospital, on the operating table, having my spleen stapled back together by a nice chap called dr. slaughter who has a glass eye and longer hair than a horse's mane. it was a long operation - twelvty hours long in fact - as my spleen burst into a shower of blood raining down on the risograph machine like monsoon season in asia. it burst like a pin pricked balloon because i read curly's corner shop's first post for today where he highlighted the reason for newcastle not winning the super casino license as the london labour government feel that newcastle is isolated and "remote". read the full story here.

The Government's independent casino advisory panel said Newcastle's proposal was
"sound" but they cited the city's "relative remoteness" and "limited catchment
area" as weaknesses.

i'm clearly too thick to understand this so i need some help here.

what is newcastle remote from - the couple of millions of people who live within an hour's drive?

how is remote-ness a factor in the success of super casino's? sure the desert that las vegas is in makes it sooo close to everywhere else in america but that doesn't mean the several million who live within a two hour's drive of newcastle will have to cross a desert... does it?

there are three cabinet mps from the north east - are they thus remote mps now?

and if newcastle is remote then what the hell do this lot think of scotland?

if nulabour have not lost the polt they i seriously have to question whether they had the polt to begin with...

this weeks top motor

2007-01-30T23:22:00.000Z

i appear to have a modicum of return visitors - google analytics anyone? - so have decided to make this blog/rant/waste of internet space less passive. one of my interests is cars thanx to a dieting norn iron pal and top gear. on the top right i have added a picture of an audi rs4 which is one of my favourite motors and have invited readers to suggest a car for next week's blurb.

there is nothing to this other than my wanting to share a hobby with those few dozen readers who actualy bother to read this page. at the moment a ford is going up for next week as the tory hippy made a request; please for the love of what ever god you believe in send alternative options so i can avoid advertising a ford! for the sake of it i will add a post about each car noted - if you provide a reason why you want a car up i will use that otherwise google will be employed.

now the science bit over, the fun bit begins...

audi rs4 because...

the basic quattro model comes with a 6 speed, 420 bhp engine for just over £50,000. thats half the power of a bugati veron for 1/20 the price! and its petrol - so good for the environment ;-) as you bomb round edinburgh in second gear...

it looks good too. not the nicest on the market - db9 anyone? - but great on the eye.

the two types of audi i have driven (80 and a3) have thus in common: drive comfort, odd features designed well - such as arm rests - and clever shell features. by this i mean in both you know where the front is and the back ends which is handy for parking.

the 12 yr old 80 had more features despite being a basic model than my old 10 yr escort and 11 yr old fiesta. i will not mention the clio... the 4yr old a3 (again basic model) packs more basics than a 1 yr old toyota avensis basic. thus you get more for your money.

speaking of money - audi's cost just enough to stop them being common. the most popular audi in britain is the a4 with 18% of audi sales being a varient of this model. audi's market share is small at best. and by common i mean this - we used to talk of 'mondeo man' but now the most bought saloon in the uk is the 3 series bmw. audi build cars a little better than bmw do, but their quality is just enough to make them unique, and noticeable on the street. as opposed to generic.

what car should i rant about next and why?

email me at:

boardman [dot] r [at] btinternet [dot] com

raf cut by over 40%, the navy by over 25%

2007-01-30T11:56:00.000Z

earlier the campaign highlighted how bliar had promised stability for our armed forces then proceeded to declare war more times than any british prime minister since days of empire (read here) as well as pointing out that one museum has more aircraft than our amred forces has attack craft (read here) and today, for those who care, comes proof of the massive cuts nulabour have made to our entire armed forces.

tony bliar, the daily telegraph, february 1997:

"the people who have had to bear the burden of these cuts are our servicemen and
women, overstretched and under strength as never before. the strain on our armed
forces is huge."

1997

army - 101, 360

navy - 3 aircraft carriers

12 destroyers

23 frigates

raf - 16 offensive squadrons

6 defence squadrons

13 transport squadrons

2007

army - down 1,900 (-1.8%)

navy - down 1 aircraft carrier (-33%)

down 4 destroyers (-25%)

down 6 frigates (-26%)

raf - down 5 offensive squadrons (-31.25%)

down 3 defence squadrons (-50%)

down 5 transport squadrons (-38.5%)

across the board thats a 29.36% cut..!!

the pope is jewish, jade goodey a rolemodel and nulabour have not screwed our armed forces over...

source: hansard via a Y campaign informant...

so that's a no to england being treated as an equal

2007-01-29T20:22:00.000Z

the scots have st andrews day, the welsh st davids and norn iron st patricks; but england are not to get to celebrate our national day. expect some stories in april of councils pulling to the plug on st georges day and in may, for union day.

i got this email from 10 downing street after i signed an e-petition:

The Government receives a variety of suggestions for new or different Bank
Holidays and celebrations. Whilst the Government is pleased that so many
people are interested, as you can imagine it is not possible to please everyone
as to who or what should be celebrated. Unlike Northern Ireland, where St
Patrick's Day is a bank holiday, bank and public holidays in Great Britain do
not, by tradition commemorate particular individuals, events, or institutions,
other than those associated with Christmas and Easter. Moreover, many
individuals and communities in England already celebrate St George's Day in a
way they consider more suitable. The present pattern of bank holidays in
the United Kingdom is well established and accepted, and the Government has no
current plans to change the arrangements.

read in full here.

nothing like mocking the french

2007-01-29T19:53:00.000Z

grand theft tory

2007-01-29T19:30:00.000Z

some times you just wish his stories were true!

read the spine's latest exclusive in full here.

10 years on and another lie exposed...

2007-01-29T17:49:00.000Z

tony bliar in 1997:

"my pledge to our armed forces is that we will offer a period of stability. a new labour governement will be committed to maintaining strong and modern forces designed for the world we now live in."

the daily telegraph, february 1997.

the reality is not stability but increased operational committments...

bosnia - 1992 - still ongoing

operation desert fox (iraq) - 1998

kosovo - 1999 - still ongoing

sierra leone - 2000 - still ongoing

afghanistan - 2001 - still ongoing

operation talic (iraq) - 2003 - still ongoing

this isn't just tony bliar's fault; even though he made the promise in 1997 and loves to play war lord and act big in the white house, blame should be attributed to a decade of mis-guided foriegn secretaries. if only they all had the conviction and integrity of robin cook (mostly a mis-guided w**k but at least he stood firm in his convictions). one day a promise to stabilise our military, the next they declare war more times than any government since the days of empire...

hat-tip to the fellow Y campaigner informant...

more aircraft in a museum than our armed forces

2007-01-28T16:04:00.000Z

this should perhaps be in a special 'britain - our doors are open' section.

there are more aircraft in one museum than britain has attack aricraft to defend herself.

With the entire collection holding over 200 aircraft at the raf museum in london.

whilst britain only has 212 attack aircraft: this includes 139 strike force and offensive support craft and 73 helicopters with attack capability (33 x puma hc1, 22 x merlin hc3, 18 x hawk ta1).

furthermore; if you read the second article to bottom you will notice that britain has more training aircraft (235) than it does aircraft to defend itself.

britain is now ranked 10th in the world when expenditure and capability are measured. i can understand why we are ranked behind china, the u.s., japan and india. but why the hell are we behind brazil and turkey?!!? worse; we have less frontline personnel than indonesia (316,000), thailand (314,000) and mexico (192,770) - we have 190,000.

i'll avoid the politics about how labour's many strategic defence reviews have continually cut back our military strength to the point that brazil could invade us and thailand can out-fight us. labour supporters should be ashamed of themselves.

update 29 jan 07: the following link was left in the comments section but wouldn't hyper-link - it's utterly of a different position to mine...

i leave for 5 minutes and look what mess they create

2007-01-25T13:42:00.000Z

i'm not the first - actually i'm probably the last - to pick up on this cracking story that suggests the scottish parliament elections in may are illegal and should not be held, because prisoners aren't allowed to vote...

what i haven't noticed yet is anyone with a similar gut response to myself - hmm, maybe this is a hint - which is so what? big deal.

i thought the idea of prison was that custodial sentences' are a form of punishment. you commit a crime and get punished; that is how things used to be. now, thanks to our beloved leaders our prisoners get sky tv (some law abiding citizens can't afford this luxury) and have more free phone calls than soliders serving in iraq (so we expect them to get shot at but not to want to phone home?!?). prison has lost it's purpose, which probably helps explains why john read only wants the most dangerous locked up.

actually, no one seemed to have my response to that either. only the most dangerous, doesn't that mean just plain old dangerous are set free?

anyhu, may's elections aren't going to happen now. yay, mconnell's dream come true.

like a ptarmigan broadcast in reverse

2007-01-22T11:34:00.000Z

a naff joke there for anyone who has also served in her maj's army as well.

for many reasons transmission has been null and will continue to be so as i move from the great city of edinburgh back to the even greater area of northern england where i believe bt will bugger around until they bother to connect me up to broadband like i've paid for.

what is there to miss about this city then? friends? some i knew before i arrived some i made here (the hippy clearly needs a special mention - how many lib dem voting, tree festival goers would take on a job with a bunch of tories and stand tall in her convictions? i thought i was brave just by being a tory growing up in bliar's constituency. take a bow hippy.) the night life; actually this is quite seedy, especially around anywhere with the word 'market' in it's name but there is the stand comedy club and sportsters bar for the football which are worth a visit. i didn't think much of the supposed walks around morningside and arthur's seat; anoyone else who has lived in fife and been on the east neuk walks will know why. the greatest thing about the place is the feel, the vibrancy and the welcome attitude that pervades the streets, the bars and attractions. how many nationalities and members of differing cultures live in affluent peace here? so many things make edinburgh a fun place to live in which is why i will never understand how anyone living here can want independance; so much will be lost not to mention the openess that gives the auld town so much of its charm. alas, that is no longer my battle.

my battle lies south, where real narrow minded people live in a kind of poverty beaten only by glasgow's worst areas and any iraqi market town. where many of my peers aspire only not to be caught by the benefit fraud officers or that they can avoid yeilding children before they themselves hit maturity. a wholly different social disorder awaits, one step at a time eh? could really do with the hippy there to remind me that not everything is the fault of wollen jumper wearing tree hugging eco facists... but then we all need to learn a new trick don't we? maybe scotland will learn that it is one country of several benefiting from a political union and maybe i will learn to embrace liberal conservatism more.

now to pack this computer away, with the rest of the boxes, into the run down ford escort i've recently become the proud owner off, and attempt - for the first time ever, and probably last - to drive through edinburgh without getting utterly lost at some point.

the scottish gaelic centre, berkley street, glasgow

2007-01-18T22:52:00.000Z

an amazing place really. today i met a child, surely no older than 6 or 7 years old, who spoke to me in 5 languages. inspiring.

was set up by a psuedo family business. awe inspiring.

is the first of it's kind in scotland. bold.

is situated in an old, abandoned secondary school. capitalist.

educates children from primary level, through secondary, to scottish higher levels. children identified as having 'behavourial' issues are quickly identified and treat by the same teachers throughout their entire school life. sensible.

produces socially confident pupils; as a st andrews grad i find this a vitally important 'life' tool. important.

there was a sign in one corridor which was designed by one of the pupils. the child wrote a passage in gaelic at the top above two crayoned drawings of people. the person on the left had a speech bubble in which something in gaelic was written. a large green tick was scrawled next this image. on the right was a person with 'good morning' written in the speech bubble. a large red cross was scrawled next to this image. english is clse to outlawed in this school. worryingly interesting.

the school had no none scottish ethnic pupils and despite having "a few interested inquiries from other types" the school is utterly scottish lead. plain worrying.

the school produces great pupils with top quality skills. but it is also an snp wet dream; scots who care nothing for our common language or multicultarism.

and they got shat on from a very high height

2007-01-17T23:53:00.000Z

as a boro fan watching this, i took great pleasure. screw the geordies.

the falkirk wheel

2007-01-17T22:36:00.000Z

operates 450 boats travelling along the central belt canals, with around 1,200 transients from places like norway, sweden and eastern england.

around 45 - 47% of visitors are from england, with the scots comprising around 40% of visitors.

within 1 and a half hours drive there are close to 3.5 million potential visitors.

the centre makes close to £500,000 a year from the visitor shop sales, in total around £1.8 million is made. it costs almost this much to operate.

christmas 2006 saw 2,000 visitors in one day attend their festive celebrations; including music, santa's grotto and all the trimmings, fireworks etc.

when on the wheel you are sat in a boat, which is floating on water whilst rotating 180 degrees. i am told it's an amazing experience. the centre closes for three weeks a year for maintenance. it was closed today.

the centre is the symbolic centre of the british waterways (scotland) who are working to restore the scottish canals into a tourist destination enjoyed by communities; instead of the dregs where rubbish is dumped and children drown.

british waterways (scotland) falls under the westminster department defra, but is wholly financed by the scottish executive's transport department. one is the department of the environment and rural affairs and the other controls the motorways. it has two masters and two aims. one master wants them to increase timber freights and eliviate the motorways, the other wants environmental renewal and a top quality tourist destination bringing inward investment to help the struggling economy.

this is one of scotland's top five tourist destinations (other four being stirling castle, edinburgh castle, glasgow's science centre, and my bed) and was born through political will and high finance but is in danger of being stunted by joined up government. labour's executive needs to start talking to labour's westminster government.

it's amazing what you learn when touring with visiting mps and it's a shame a great project is endangered by a swelling state and bloated government.

labour have had a good idea here, but they are implementing it badly.

the problem with computers

2007-01-17T21:28:00.000Z

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed adistinct slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the Flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such asRomance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as: Football 5.0, Rugby 4.3 and Cricket 3.0. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs; it simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to no avail. What can I do?

Signed, Desperate ------------------

Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind,

Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Try entering the command: C:/I-THOUGHT-YOU-LOVED-ME to download Tears 6.2, which should automatically install Guilt 3.0. If that application works asdesigned, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 todefault to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. WARNING: Beer 6.1 is a very nasty program that will create Snoring Loudly. CAUTION: Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law. This is not a supported application and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memoryand cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally would recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck, Tech Support ------------------