Thursday, March 22, 2007

police defend decision not to chase the egg (anymore)

commenting after photographs suggest that part of the £70,000 worth of stolen cadbury's easter eggs were seen been driven at high speed across st andrews famous old course, local police from the fife constabulary defended their decision not to give chase.

"ack, jiz becorse we has proof tha the eggs were bein' carried in the twoked subaru impreza along the famous st andrews bridge, does nae mean wi will act." said chief inspector pointless. "efter scotland's
pathetic showing in the six nations it is national policy te nae longer chase eggs in public. anyone wanting the neds caught shud wait until they make it te france, or ireland, ack, te anywhere else where people can actually chase eggs."

bbc scotlandshire has confirmed reports that the stolen impreza was seen driving in excess of 61 mph in a 60 zone along the a91, and would normarily receive 20 drving points. the hitherto unknown leader of the scottish liberal democrats promised firm action should someone actually vote for them in may's elections: "such high powered horse-less carraiges damage our precious things with their brooms brooms and desirable ability. we would protect our trees and stop these polar bear killers; if only we had people in the cabinet in holyrood!" bemoaned nicola something.

the eggs were stolen two days ago by three masterminds who spent hours trying to out-wit the delivery lorry driver, as lazily reported by the Y campaign

1 comment:

William said...

brilliantly sarcy hehe :)